April 8, 1995


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Give up the ledger . Quit keeping a record of rights and wrongs! Shut down the accounting department. Erase any debts you feel others owe you because of their mistreatment. Shift to a new basis for your treatment of others. Treat them well regardless of how they treat you.

Give up the “anti-wimp” perspective. Let go of your fear of being viewed as soft. Let go of the thought that you are a wimp if you don’t repay every wrong. It actually takes more strength to treat others well in the face of mistreatment.

There is an ancient proverb that says, “If your enemy is hungry, give him food to eat; if he is thirsty, give him water to drink. In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head.” The stronger person is the one who shows kindness to those who mistreat him.

Give up your competitive nature. Many of us hate to lose more than anything in the world. Whether it is Little League or racquet ball, we are competitive to the core. To allow someone to one-up us in the office or in a relationship would be conceding a loss. That is un-American! Exhibiting the Golden Touch is not a game. Remember that treating others better than they treat you is a win.

Maybe you heard about the fellow who was told by his physician, “Yes indeed, you do have rabies.” Upon hearing this, the patient immediately pulled out a pad of paper and a pencil and began to write. Thinking the man was making out his will, the doctor said, “Listen, this doesn’t mean you’re going to die. There’s a cure for rabies/” “I Know that,” said the man. “ I’m makin’ a list of people I’m gonna bite.”—Charles Swindoll

Give up your rights. We all believe that we have the right to be treated fairly. The customer is always right. Faster drivers get the left lane. If your pizza arrives in more than 30 minutes, then it’s free. But in order to live out next-level thinking, we have to give some rights up. We can’t treat others better than they treat us if we are demanding justice and fairness. By giving up those rights we are laying the foundation for next-level living.

● Why is “giving up” such a hard concept to embrace?

● How can “giving up” bring freedom to your life?

● How do you think Mephibosheth’s life was impacted by King David “giving up”?

Name a mistreatment you have experienced How do you feel when wronged? How can you live out treating them better?

“ You have to get beyond blaming others … give up your excuses … stand responsible for what you do … ultimately, ethics ends up an individual exercise.” (Price Pritchett, Ph.D. web2)

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