Knowing that what you do matters builds your self-confidence and self-worth. The people who work with you and for you possess the same desire—even those who don’t show it. Human relations expert and author Donald Laird asserted, “Always help people increase their own self-esteem. Develop your skill in making other people feel important. There is hardly a higher compliment you can pay an individual than helping him to be useful and to find satisfaction in his usefulness.”
How can you do that? Begin by letting people know that you appreciate their efforts. Thank them at every opportunity. Give credit to others every time you can. And make it a point to praise people in the presence of those closest to them, such as family members.
Trust lies at the heart of all high-performing organizations. In his book, The Five Dysfunctions of a Team, Patrick Lencioni states the number one dysfunction of leadership in teams is an absence of trust. In the absence of trust, Lencioni says people:
● Conceal weaknesses and mistakes from one another
● Hesitate to ask for help or provide constructive feedback
● Hesitate to offer outside their own area of responsibility
● Jump to conclusions about the intentions and aptitudes of others without attempting to clarify them
● Fail to recognize and tap into one another’s skills and experiences
● Waste time and energy managing their behaviors for effect
● Hold grudges
● Dread meetings and find reason to avoid spending time together.
Faith is not belief without proof, but trust without reservation.—Elton Trueblood
We all deeply desire to be trusted. Without trust there can be no relationship. Trust is the foundation of all good relationships. If you don’t have trust, there can be no open and honest interaction, and the relationship will be only temporary. In order to have trust in someone or be trusted, we have to act in a trustworthy manner. The greater the degree of sustained integrity that is displayed in an individual, the easier it is to trust them.
Are you Trustworthy?
Check out the following list of trust-breaking behaviors. Grade yourself in trustworthiness by circling the most appropriate evaluation point following each statement:
1. I fail to keep my time commitments
2. I fail to accomplish the tasks I am responsible for
3. I use lies to prevent tense moments
4. I share confidential conversations to with other people
5. I borrow something and fail to return it to the proper location in a timely manner
6. I talk about someone maliciously behind their back
7. I gossip about others
8. I steal from others
9. I break the operating rules of my organization
10. I fail to keep my financial obligations fully and on time
11. I manipulate a situation or person to get what I want
12. I break a previous commitment because of a new opportunity
● Based on your answers to the questions above, are you a trustworthy person?
● Name an area of concern in which you need to guard yourself.
● How can you begin to build greater trust from others?
● Which of the above trust breakers, if broken by one of your associates, would create the greatest amount of distrust in you? Why?
To be trusted is a greater compliment than to be loved.—George MacDonald